So, having finished a book sooner than I would have wanted (ie - need to find a new book sooner) I was checking out the other blogs through Blogger. Yikes !!!! There sure are some interesting ones - enough to make the boldest person blush. Many honestly are just boring. All in the eye of the beholder I suppose.
But then I came upon this one and damn if I wasn't reading a part of my own life. It actually makes me laugh with embarrassment seeing it from another.
The writer is talking about rules of socialization....
> Number 1: SAY LESS. I talk a lot. I share, for some obnoxious reason, the little thoughts that cross my mind, like "god I
> LOVE veggie sandwiches" who cares? Unless I think it is an important tidbit of information, or that it will spark an
> interesting conversation, there is no need for it.
Like I ever do that? ;-) Lightening bolt number one.
> Number 2: Behave as if you have some self-esteem. Who wants to be friends with the most insecure girl in the world?
Eh, this one not so much, but some people have a gift of making me question it.
>Number 3: Be attractive. There is a psychological thing with friendships. We want to be around people that represent us
>positively. It isn't superficial unless you only choose friends who are attractive.
Can only work with what you've got...know what I'm saying?
> Number 4: Be my funny, loveable self. I am fun, I really am, but sometimes I am just so serious! I need to crack jokes like I
> do with my pilots, instead of bringing up all of the terrible things going on in our country and the world. Heard of Debbie
> Downer? That's TOTALLY me!
Yeah. TOTAL gift for this one. Can't live life on an upper though. (then again, substance speaking, I guess you could, but...)Anyway, I tend to go to the all serious probably more often than necessary. Especially presently.
> Number 5: Don't shower her with attention anunsoliciteded favors. I do this to people because it just feels so good. “Maybe
> Jennifer could use these push pins, I will set them out for her. It may be coming from a good place, but it can make people
> uncomfortable. ... It is fine to do little things here and there, but just like with a man, too much is too much. (Thank
> goodness Charles and I are so well balanced in the sweetness, I can dote on him as much as I want, he dotes back and
> doesn't take me for granted)
No Charles here, but again.... ooops. How much is too much? I think I can rationalize my way out of this one, but the point is still made. Concerning most people, not a problem. Concerning others, well..... who need boundaries ??? Crap. Gotta work here.
> Number 6: This fits in the "Don't be a Debbie Downer"” category...HEY! DIANA! Don't tell your life story, past, present and
> future. It's fine, in little snippets, OVER TIME, and when asked, but you do not need to put your whole life and character on
> the table right away, it is not only unnecessary, it is socially inappropriate.
Ouch!!!!! Ok. Again, in regards to most, not a problem. As to others, I typically test safetly first and then, heaven help them if they are chosen for the life saga. Do I know why I do that? Yup. And it's developed over time. #1 childhood family. Talk, who needs that? A grunt and command work well. #2 additional family - I think when....closely associated to a non- communicative (in any fashion) person, those who need that desperately search for one who is.
It's like being on the ocean and dying of thirst kind of thing. You long for it, but know the inherent dangers. And when one is found that you want to be communicative with and she/he chooses not to return the curse.... heaven help them. My advise, apologize profusely and provide a pair of ear plugs as a friendly gesture. Or start blogging :-)
Thank goodness some folk actually spin it into a "quid pro quo" relationship. As long as the balanced and maintained, I think those relationships are .... "spiffy"
Wow. I can't even describe how I am processing this. All I can think is an expletive beginning with "s". Ughhhh.
I think it does help me remember one of the reasons why those who believe in a divine power may choose to do so. Unconditional love. When you speak, you believe someone who cares is listening. And when you are hurt, angry, upset, and whatever else, you believe someone wants to listen and ... cares, hopes and feels with you. People who believe don't seem to search for that. I think people who don't, may. I guess maybe that's why some people have pets too.
Great, give up on religion - get a pet instead. Not the message I mean to send here. Pets (sadly) die.
But in the end, all I can think is (as Grandpa always used to say) "Son of a B*#&h"...... something else to add to the "to-do" list. Like I needed more. Damn blogs !!!!!!!
Addendum - Sorry about the pet comment. But, it is nice to have something in your life to talk to that will reserve judgement, and sometimes comment. I have a hamster. It's best to talk with him when he's running on his wheel, but heck if he doesn't squeak sometimes. Mouthy. ;-). Honestly, he doesn't rank real high in the conversation department either. Seems a gift of mine to be compelled to such things.
Either that or I'm not as religious as a person with, say, a saint bernard. (Come on people, lighten up.) Another blog......
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