From a student's Facebook page:
Tux speaking "Failure isn't an option. However it does come pre-bundled with Windows." I laughed at that one :-)
When life is crashing down on you, check for missing semi-colons.
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
People say that if you play Microsoft CD’s backwards, you hear satanic things, but that’s nothing, because if you play them forwards, they install Windows.
The ultimate metric that I would like to propose for user friendliness is quite simple: if this system was a person, how long would it take before you punched it in the nose?
Always program as if the person who will be maintaining your program is a violent psychopath that knows where you live.
Artificial Intelligence: The art of making real computers act like the ones in movies.
A computer program will always do what you tell it to, and seldom what you want it to.
I had a fortune cookie the other day and it said: 'Outlook not so good'. I said: 'Sure, but Microsoft ships it anyway'.
It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.
If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.
Real men don't use backups, they post their stuff on a public ftp server and let the rest of the world make copies.
Ah.... so clever.
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