Relationships - part x

(NOTE: How do you indent in html???????)

My head hurts so much from thinking about this topic lately, that I almost (mind I say almost) can't wait for school to begin again to distract me from it. ( Although what is school, but one big arena of varying relationships).

I'm not sure what I'm going to write, or in what order, but perhaps writing will do one of the following:

a) help organize my own thoughts
b) ask others to sound out in contrasting thought or in in agreement.
c) let me see what I thought in 2008/beginning 2009 when it is 2020 (and I am 44 - ugh)

These 'buzz' words keep dancing in my head: change, acceptance, compromise, desires/wants, needs, truth, convenience, fear, availability, closure, responsibility, honesty,why. There may be more, so I'll alter as needed.

Some folks believe that such discussions and feelings about such things should be kept close to the vest. Well, for me personally, I might as well be a flasher when it comes to this, so if it gets too much, cover your eyes and close the window.

As I begin this entry, I see that it is going to be an extensive project, so as I have other things to do today ( and the rest of my life) I'll try to get the outline done. Feel free to interject to this, even in it's creation stage. And it's rough, I assure you.....

I) Acceptance

A) The need to be accepted or loved - universal or individual?
B) Personal - self

1) innate traits
2) self expectation
3) social expectation
4) experience molded thought
5) external rules and guidelines
a) family
b) culture
c) religion
6) Conditional vs unconditional

C) Social - others

1) personal expectation of others
2) social schemas - I'm not sure what to do here yet - organized factions - religious, popular, geek/nerd, goth/dark/people in black, pretentious, or types within recluse/sterile, socialite, workaholic, social climber
3) Conditional vs unconditional

II) Change

A) Inevitable vs controlled
B) Progressive or retrograde motion
C) Self expection vs social expectation of causation
D) Needed or wanted vs forced
1)Control/forced vs compromise

E) Coping with
1) confrontation
2) escape-avoidance-denial
3) transference - displacement - projection
4) Overintellectualization - Hmmmmmmm.( dealing with problems as interesting events that can be explained rationally and that have no anxiety or emotional content attached to them)

III) Relationships

A) Personal

1) Family
2) Friendship
3) Significant other

B) Social

1) Acquaintance
2) Co worker
3) Societal roles

Ok. Done for now - needs more thought. This is my analytical side as you can see. I can feel an emotional response brewing which may come later.